I’ve been choosing a “word of the year” wrong this whole time.
And honestly? It almost broke me.
For years, I forced myself to pick something that sounded impressive. Productive. Like what a “good” productivity coach should choose.
But trying to live up to words that looked good on paper—yet felt terrible in my soul—nearly destroyed my peace.
This is what I’ve learned:
Choosing what looks good creates a burden.
Choosing what you need creates support.
And this year, my word didn’t come from goal-setting.
It found me… in a radiology waiting room, when I needed it most.
If you’re struggling to choose your word—or feel like you’ve missed the window—this is for you.
Why Forcing Your Word Backfires
Every January 1st, I used to sit down and try to “get it right.”
I’d choose words like discipline, focus, consistency.
Words that looked strong. Impressive. Aspirational.
But they didn’t feel supportive. They felt heavy.
And that’s the part no one talks about:
When your word feels like pressure, it becomes just another thing you’re failing at.
A Different Kind of Productivity
This winter, I’m not charging out of the gate.
I’m choosing rest over resolution.
Which, I’ll admit, feels like a strange thing for a productivity coach to say.
But sometimes, real productivity looks—and feels—like rest.
I’m in what I call a way station season.
Less schedule. More surrender.
Less pushing. More listening.
Because the truth is, the past decade has felt like pushing a boulder uphill.
First cancer.
Then a pandemic.
Then years of senior caregiving.
A lot of it felt like loss.
I kept wondering, When is it finally my turn?
Lately, I’ve been working to shift that story.
To notice what I’ve gained.
To recognize the ways I’ve made a difference—even if they don’t match traditional definitions of success.
(You can take the girl out of Wall Street… but it’s a lot harder to take Wall Street out of the girl.)
Those old benchmarks still whisper.
Always measuring. Always demanding more.
The Moment My Word Found Me
Because of all this, my usual rhythm—intentions, plans, tasks—hasn’t been happening.
And that’s exactly when my word found me.
I kept seeing the same line from a poem by John Roedel:
“Let me be water.”
Twice in one week.
That’s usually a sign.
Then I found myself sitting in the back room of a radiology department—again—while staff tried to untangle a scheduling issue they’d already assured me was resolved.
(It wasn’t.)
So I sat there, hands over my heart, quietly repeating:
Let me be water.
Let me be water.
Let me be water.
Until—just maybe—I could feel a little less like I was pushing a boulder…
and a little more like I could flow.
When I got home, I found the full poem and let it sink in.
And I knew.
Water wasn’t just a word.
It was exactly what I needed.
How to Find Your Word (Without Forcing It)
If you take nothing else from this, take this:
Don’t choose what you want. Choose what you need.
Most people pick aspirational words.
But the better questions are:
- What feels scarce in my life right now?
- What am I resisting?
- What would actually support my nervous system this year?
Your word should feel like a blanket—not a chain around your ankle.
Let Your Word Find You
Instead of forcing it, pay attention.
Notice:
- The phrases that keep showing up
- Lines from books or poems that stick with you
- Words you feel in your body before you fully understand them
Your word won’t arrive through pressure.
It will arrive like the first warm day of spring.
Unexpected. Gentle. Obvious once you feel it.
Once You Have Your Word, Don’t Turn It Into a Rule
This is where most people get stuck.
They turn their word into a command.
“I have to live my word today.”
No wonder it stops working.
Instead, try this:
- How could I use my word in this moment?
- How could my word support me today?
Your word is a question.
A companion.
Not a boss.
My Word This Year
This year, I’m choosing to flow.
To soften instead of push.
To trust instead of force.
To stop trying to get where I’m going by effort alone…
and instead, step into the boat and let the current carry me.
Faith in the water.
Let me be water.
One Last Thing
If you think you’ve missed your chance to choose a word this year…
You haven’t.
Words don’t follow the calendar.
They follow the seasons of your soul.
And your season might just be beginning.
Stop forcing. Start listening.
What word is finding you this year?
